Monday, December 12, 2011

run for it!

Some of you know me.  I mean, REALLY know me.  And although I'm really all about being healthy, I exercise very, um, infrequently.  I mean, come on...who has time? 

Unfortuntately for me, this summer, I did.  Had lots of time.  So I decided to sign up for my first 5K.  (please keep your laughing to a minimum)  A local orphan care ministry was having a fundraiser - and if there was any reason to get me to run - this was it.  I typically say that I don't run unless someone is chasing me with a sharp object.  Or a Diet Coke.  Then I'll run.  ;-) 

So, I roped my older sister into the race with me, and Caleb joined in the fun, too. 

So, without further ado...

Here comes Caleb! 
 He ran a 1 mile race...he was the 1st place finisher for boys! 
Here we go! 
You don't need to know our time, right?  ;-) 
We finished! 

And while we didn't win anything crazy, we all finished, and I was super proud to have reached a goal that I had been working towards.  We didn't just run for us, and that's what made it feel best of all. 

We ran for the fatherless. 

We ran for friends who are adopting. 

We ran for our new godson/nephew/cousin Levi.

We ran for our little one. 

Here we come, baby girl.  We're "running for it"...

Monday, October 24, 2011

To be honest and all.

Friends, this is so long overdue, I feel I need to write to purge my soul and apologize, all at the same time!  I used to write and journal for myself...and I often feel like I have time for everything BUT myself as of late.  I am making no promises that the journey will continue to be regular, but I will promise for it to be honest! 

I know so many of you continue to read our blog to follow our adoption journey.  That journey is long and difficult and it seems to have come to a stall.  We have been waiting for 6 months...well, make that 14 years...but on a "real" waiting list for 6 months - simply for an application.  A piece of paper.  Something that says, yes...we'll consider you a family worth investing in a forever for.  The call to adopt is never one that we will question...but the process...oh, the process...

We have been through things that many families have struggled with - marital growing pains, sudden deployment, miscarriage, financial setbacks, job issues, etc. - and we are blessed that God continues to show himself strong in the midst of that AND in bringing glory to himself.  We have laughed and cried with many of you as we have been able to share our story of redemption and healing and believe that God works through those conversations.  We have rejoiced in the inexplicable joy of dear friends expanding their families through their bellies and their hearts. 

But we continue to wait. 

Its hard and it hurts and its ugly and it sucks.  To be honest and all. 

And some days its beautiful and its just fine and sometimes its full of hope and promise.  To be honest and all. 

Many of you know our hearts and have walked this process with us for a few years now as it has ebbed and flowed in its own way.  We thank you because there are times I feel we couldn't live without your encouragement.  Right now, after a long journey in the desert, I feel that hope is rising in my own heart again.  That God is on the move.  His faithfulness is astounding and His promises are true.  My heart is believing it. 

I don't know what the journey looks like from here...but I have some good perspective.  The sun is rising on the side of the mountain that I am climbing and the light can be blinding.  But we are never walking alone. 

“They say Aslan is on the move - perhaps has already landed.”

And now a very curious thing happened. None of the children knew who Aslan was any more than you do; but the moment the Beaver had spoken these words everyone felt quite different. Perhaps it has sometimes happened to you in a dream that someone says something which you don't understand but in the dream it feels as if it had some enormous meaning - either a terrifying one which turns the whole dream into a nightmare or else a lovely meaning too lovely to put into words, which makes the dream so beautiful that you remember it all your life and are always wishing you could get into that dream again. It was like that now. At the name of Aslan each one of the children felt something jump in its inside. Edmund felt a sensation of mysterious horror. Peter felt suddenly brave and adventurous. Susan felt as if some delicious smell or some delightful strain of music had just floated by her. And Lucy got the feeling you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that it is the beginning of the holidays or the beginning of summer.

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe – Chapter 7

I love that.  To be honest and all.  <3

Monday, August 15, 2011


"Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."  Matthew 6:33

Friends, pray for me.  I am so struggling right now...

Gonna be honest about where my heart is - I'm praying that prayer up there...but backwards.  I want the "all things added to me" before I am seeking God and his will.  That's an ugly realization.  I think I have gotten so consumed by the adoption, family circumstances, etc...I have been "seeking" God's will on those things and allowed my simple desire for God, and God alone, to get lost in the shuffle.  Now, I certainly don't want you to think I've gone all 'heathen' on you...that's not the case.  Just a good swift kick in my own pants about my priorities.  I want to desire him above everything else. 

My blog friend, Jennifer, wrote the most incredible post about this...I hope you'll head over and be encouraged!! 

Saturday, August 6, 2011


Welp, J's gone for two weeks.  The Army calls...and we're gonna miss him!! 

Caleb put it very well yesterday.  He very thoughtfully said, after I asked how he was doing with daddy leaving, "Well...daddy was gone for a whole year before.  Yeah, I can do two more weeks.  I can do two weeks."  He nodded for just a bit more affirmation. 

I think we can do it too, mister...

Friday, June 17, 2011


There's a song I have long loved by Steven Curtis Chapman, and its words have been echoing through my brain these last few weeks. 

"Oh how great is the love
The father has lavished upon us
That we should be called
The sons and the daughters of god

We are speechless so amazed
We stand in awe of your grace
We stand in awe of your mercy
You have saved us
We stand in awe of your love
From the grave
We are speechless

We are speechless in your presence now
We stand in awe of your cross
We're astounded as we consider how
We stand in awe of your power
You have shown us
A love that leaves us speechless
We are speechless"

Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.  Joshua and I have said that we truly feel that we've "stepped off the boat" when it comes to the adoption.  We believe that even with all of the uncertainty with time frames, etc....God is truly meeting us the midst of the storm and doubt and renewing our faith.  Our faith in Him.  Our faith in others' love and faithfulness.  Yes, we ARE speechless. 

Our first fundraiser - our yard sale - was a wonderful success!  THANK YOU to everyone who donated items, dropped things off, let us borrow your truck for weeks (Neal!), and served with us selflessly for 2 days (my sisters and brother-in-law, Josh and Annie, Tina, Stephanie, the Crosiers...I hope I didn't forget anyone!!).  It truly was a fish and loaves experience...I have never seen so much stuff!  I have also never been so blessed by the goodness of loved ones and strangers. In 2 days, we were able to raise $2,129!  Thank you, thank you, thank you...

Our Leaves of Love fundraiser is also going well.  I'll post more on that later!  So far, that has raised about $600!! 

So, all said, between the two fundraisers and our saving, pinching and being as wise as we can be, our adoption account is at:  $4,232.05. 

Speechless.  God is SO good!! 

Sunday, June 12, 2011

School's Out For Summer...

Wish I could follow that line up with "School's out forever", but alas, it is not to be so.  :-)  Just kidding ~ I SO love my job.  That being said though, with summer's arrival, my blog hiatus is up! 

I have lots to share to get you up to speed on our lives...We'll be back soon!  Stay tuned! 


Sunday, May 1, 2011

Carr Family Update

Dear Friends and Family,

Wow…where to begin?!  This will be your Christmas-in-Spring letter…times a million!  J  We hope this letter finds you well!  It has been a crazy couple of years for the Carr’s!  Joshua was gone all of 2009 in Iraq, but came home safely to us, and 2010 was a year of immense gratefulness for our family.  2011 has so far been exceptionally full of blessings as well…

·         Joshua continues to work at the YMCA in Cuyahoga Falls as the Associate Executive Director.  He works part-time at the Beacon Journal (local newspaper) in the sports department 3 nights a week, and also is still a ‘weekend warrior’ with the National Guard.  Joshua also works with senior high youth group at our church and is on the leadership board as a delegate.  He’s sort of our super star. 

·         Meg is in her 3rd year teaching at Roberts Middle School in Cuyahoga Falls.  She’s the goofiest 6th grade Social Studies teacher they have…and loves her job.  Meg also works with the senior high youth group, and especially loves meeting with and mentoring young girls. 

·         Caleb is finishing up kindergarten.  He is working hard on reading, learning math skills, and loves art.  He has tried his hand on a t-ball, soccer and basketball team.  Caleb is also on our church dance team and loves to worship! 

Even though we’ve painted a picture-perfect idea of what life has been like for us lately, the last few years has also come with difficulties; job worries, health concerns, loss of loved ones, etc.  Through it all, God has been faithful and has shown our family great things.  Jeremiah 33:3 says, “Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.”  One of those things is what we want to share with you today.  Over the last few years, Joshua and I have felt very strongly on our hearts that we were supposed to adopt.  This was never a “Plan B” for our family – it was always something we felt God leading us to, but were not sure of the timing.  Though we can no longer have biological children of our own, the three of us feel that as a family, we are blessed to proceed with a process that we know is close to the heart of God.  Many people may have questions about what we’re doing, so we’d like to answer some of them.  If you have more, please feel free to call or email us! 

Joshua:                330.327.7700
Meg:         330.962.4787

Why adoption?  Again, biologically, we cannot have more children.  This has been so difficult emotionally, but we always knew we would adopt.  The Bible talks about adoption in a myriad of ways, most of them being that God is a father to the fatherless, and that we ALL have been adopted into His family through our salvation.  Some of the most notable adoptees in the Bible were Jesus himself (with Joseph as his adopted earthly father) and Moses (adopted by the pharaoh of Egypt!).  We feel that adoption is a directive of the gospel, and while people play different parts in that role, we feel that our role is to be the adoptive family. 

Domestic or International?  We have decided together (all three of us!) to adopt internationally.  Right now, we are looking at Asia.  There are many reasons for this, and you are welcome to ask away!  The best way we can explain it is that we know God’s heart is for the world – and so is ours.  There are 145 million orphans in the world and we know that we are able to help at least one of them!  Many Asian countries have up to a 53% abortion rate, because it is considered shameful to have children out of wedlock.  Adoption domestically there is also not widely accepted.  We feel very strongly that adoption not feel like a ‘business’, but as a way for many like-minded people to work together to form families, and so we are excited to work with a ministry as opposed to an agency.  (Many people want to know why we did not consider domestic adoption, and the best answer is – we did – but we feel, for a variety of reasons, that this is the best option for us.) 

How long does it take?  That’s a tricky question.  J  We sure wish it was quick and easy, but for things to be ethical, we know that this will certainly be a process. 
Why is it so expensive?  People assume so many things about the cost of adoption, such as domestic adoptions being more inexpensive than international (which actually isn’t true), that we must be rich (NOT true! *laughing*), or that we will be writing one big check to our adoption agency and that's the end of that.  None of these statements could be farther from the truth!  There are fees associated with our applications, country, orphanage, home study, legal documents, notarization, translating, background checks, fingerprinting, travel, visas, and more.  We'll certainly be writing checks to our agency, but our money will also be flowing into our local and state governments and various institutions in Asia.  While we understand the exceptional cost, we also understand the exceptional way that God provides!  We are saving, planning and working to make sure that this happens!   We currently have the following fundraisers planned, with more in the works: 

  • Leaves of Love Tree – ongoing
  • Friends and Family Garage Sale – May
  • Dinner Theater – October (tentative date)

How can we help?  Lots of people have asked how they can help, which blesses us SO much!  We love that adoption is a collective effort – very much what the Body of Christ represents.  We need prayer, first and foremost!  Prayer for our family, the process itself, and our little one.  We need donations and/or volunteers for our garage sale in May.  Also, we would LOVE to have you be a part of our Leaves of Love Tree! 

If you live close, and have items you would like to donate to our garage sale, feel free to email or call us to set up a time to drop off your items. 

If you decide to donate to our Leaves of Love Tree, you can mail us your donation: 

Joshua and Meg Carr
**email us for address**

Thank you all SO much! 

Leaves of Love

The idea behind Leaves of Love was created by an adoptive family.  They send us a 24 x 36 print of the image you see above, with enough room for 100 – 150 thumbprints.  We are hoping to have people donate $10 or more for our “family tree”, and for each donation, we will add a thumbprint with their name, or special verse, etc. onto our tree.  Our hope is to have it framed and placed in our baby’s room as a reminder of the family that created, loved, prayed for, and helped bring her home.  If you would like to help us with this, we would be SO grateful!

We will be posting progress on our Tree, fundraising, events, process, etc. on our blog. We would love it if you followed along with us.  We are honored to call you all family, friends and loved ones. 

Friday, April 22, 2011

Sunday, April 10, 2011

beautiful things

our pastor is one of the most amazing women I've ever met.  she's doing a series right now called "beautiful things", and in light of where we are in life right now, its perfect.  sermon notes from today: 

ecclesiastes 3:11 (one of my FAVE verses ever) ~ "He has made everything beautiful in its itme.  He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end."

Beauty is subjective.
Our ideas about beauty can be terribly flawed. 
Beauty is not always practical.
Beauty originates in God.
Beautiful things inspire honor and admiration.
Beautiful things touch the soul. 
Beautiful things are born of sacrifice (I LOVE this one...the 'ouchy' ones are the best!!!)
Beautiful things point to a Creator and a Redeemer.

my mind couldn't help but wander after each point to adoption...because it is such a beautiful thing.  it is such a beautiful thing to realize that our salvation begins and ends in adoption as God brings us into His everlasting family.  what a stunning act of sacrifice and love.  i also thought of my marriage, my family, my mess of a life that He makes beautiful each day...

.i am overwhelmed by beauty

i know i've been posting lots of songs lately, but this one has SO ministered to me.  i love the words in the song:  "remind me You take broken things and turn them into beautiful..." 

praying for beautiful days ahead for you, friends...

Sunday, March 20, 2011

lacking nothing

*i have struggled for days with this post...wording and rewording to make sure that my heart is saying what it needs to say.  sometimes this blog gets more use than my journal...because its easier to delete and change!  so read gently, my friends* 

I woke up the other night, not being able to sleep.  So many things were being tossed around my head and my heart.  As I lay there, I felt like God was saying to me, "What are you lacking, precious one?" 

I felt like I could answer that in a thousand ways!  Sometimes, I feel as if I'm lacking everything...

.lacking faith.
.lacking courage.
.lacking trust.
.lacking finances.
.lacking hope.
.lacking perseverance.

And at the same time, I knew that the Holy Spirit was whispering to my soul: 

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."  ~James 1:2-4 

I was overwhelmed with the realization that, in Christ, I. lack. nothing.  God knows what he has called our family to.  God knows what we're up against.  God knows our hearts.  God knows our willingness.  God knows our tears.  God knows our struggles.  God knows our impatience.  God knows our trials.  God knows our family.  And so, even in my moments of doubt, I lack nothing. 

There is no lack of faith...for we have faith like a mustard seed. 

There is no lack of courage...for in Christ, ALL things are possible. 

There is no lack of trust...for our hearts don't lean on our own understanding.

There is no lack of finances...for we know and believe that God has called us according to His purpose and owns the cattle on a thousand hills. 

There is no lack of hope...for this is the very essence of Christ in me, the HOPE of glory. 

There is no lack of perseverance...for we are in this race until the end. 

I laid there...blown away at my unfaithfulness...ungratefulness...but, at the same time, reveling in His truth.  Our lives are the ultimate conundrum sometimes - but oh, how beautiful the mess we've made when we know that He reigns in the midst of it.  I have no doubts that I will cross some of these same bridges again, but know that God's grace covers me.  My faith is not yet mature and complete...but I strive to be more like Jesus each day. 

And what a better way to drift off to sleep, than to have my Abba Father whisper sweetly to my soul..."With me, precious one, you are lacking nothing..." 

Lord, I pray that my honest matter how ugly, raw, unbelieving or better than a hallelujah...

Saturday, March 19, 2011

children of God

totally challenged this morning....

"run after the things that scare you the most.  God is in the deep end." 

what scares me the most right now?  stepping out of the boat to reach the outstretched hand of Jesus...meeting us in the midst of our greatest hope.desire.fear.dream. 



Monday, February 21, 2011

chosen people

I've been on a Jesus Culture kick lately...if you don't know...I have one word for you:  YouTube. 

As C and I were driving today, we were singing along to 'Show Me Your Glory'....the words were over and over..."We belong to You, We belong to You..." and I turned and said to him, "Aren't you glad that we belong to Jesus?" 

He said, with his little fist in the air, "YES!!  WE ARE GOD'S CHOSEN PEOPLE!!"  I love him.  Really. 

Friends, we are in the midst of beginning great change in our family.  I said to one of my dearest friends, Sarah, this is our battle cry.  No matter what, in this process, in everything...we ARE God's chosen people and we WILL see His glory. 

Pray for us...and as always, we'll pray for you. 

Colossians 3:12 ~ Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

honest heart...thoughts from a mom

so my little guy is amazing.  [so's my big guy, for that matter *smile*]  he challenges me on such a regular basis, i don't even know why i'm surprised by it anymore.  you can read about the latest one here: 

The Spiritual Ramblings of a 6 Year Old

as i've reflected on the situation, MY heart has really been messed up.  i think about c asking for permission for something he knew, more than likely, was not okay.  his response, even when the answer was "no", was so honest and pure.  i KNOW that i don't deal with many situations in my life like he did. 

~how often do i ask my Heavenly Father is something is permissible?  is this television show edifying?  is what i'm about to eat because i'm hungry, or is there a deeper issue?  do i not ask because i already know the answer...or because i'm afraid it will be an answer i don't like? 

and when God does answer, and that answer is "no" i respond with a grateful heart?  am i content with His answers? 

these are just a smattering of the questions that are rumbling inside of me as i search to know how honest MY heart really is.  pray for me and i'll pray for you as you do the same...

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

also blogging...

Because I knew I had to finally take people's advice and start writing this stuff down...we're now blogging also at: 

The Spiritual Ramblings of a 6 Year Old

And I swear.  I don't make this stuff up.  *wink*